I’m Sikh, and I cut my hair. And if I got a dollar for every time I’ve been told that I’m not a Sikh because I cut my hair- I could probably buy a Ferrari (or pay for Med school, priorities…).
I’ve spoken about religion before (You can read it here!), and I’ll say it again, I’m not an expert on any religion, including my own. I’m also aware that religion can be interpreted by each person a different way. But at the end of the day there are core principals to each religion that cannot be forgotten, and if your interpretation of the religion starts to wander away from those principals, I believe you can be told that you are wrong. I’ve been wanting to write/speak about this topic for a few years now, because I feel as though my religion as a whole is wandering off the path our founders had made for us, and in light of recent interactions with Sikhs in the community, I finally decided to speak my mind in hopes my thoughts will spark thoughts in others. At the Gurudawara (place of worship) I attend back home, an elder member made a statement that the youth are walking away from our faith- in a way she was right, but, aunty ji, let me tell you what’s really going on…
Sikhism, essentially (or so I have been taught at the Gurudawara), came about because our first Guru, Guru Nanak Dev Ji, born a Hindu, came to the conclusion that many rituals had come in the way of religion and were blinding the core values his religion embodied. He went on pilgrimages with both Hindus and Muslims, and asked them why certain rituals were performed, and then politely argued why the ritual was nonsense using the beliefs each religion encompassed. He then proceeded to branch off both religions and start a new one, Sikhism (literal meaning of Sikh= Student). Sikhs are known to be warriors, but they should also be known as students in the classroom of life. Each Guru after Guru Nanak Dev Ji helped build the religion through life events, taking in wisdom from their fellow Hindu and Muslim colleagues. And at the end of the 10 Guru era, we, the Sikhs of today, are left with a book, our 11th and eternal Guru, the Guru Granth Sahib, which brings to together thoughtful pieces of knowledge from Sikhs, Muslims, and Hindus.
Now after that VERY brief history lesson, lets get back to the topic of hair and why the youth seem to be “walking away”. In Sikhism we have the 5 Ks, which are supposed to be our uniform. Kesh (uncut hair), Karra (Steel bracelet), Kanga (a wooden comb), Kacha (cotton underwear), and Kirpan (a steel sword) are the 5 Ks, and I fully understand the significance behind each (go read up on it, too much to explain) and how they came about, and the sacrifices made to keep this uniform intact back in the day. At first, one of the reasons the uniform came about was so you could tell who was a Sikh from a Hindu and a Muslim. And it stuck due to many things that happened during the era of the lives of 10 different Gurus (so basically a lot happened) (Ugh, sorry for continuing the history lesson). Now lets fast forward to the 21st century in America, where if a person were caught with a steel sword dangling at their waist, they would be considered a threat. So many of the Sikhs out there who keep their hair uncut and/or wear a turban, don’t carry that sword. Many girls who keep their hair uncut but don’t wear the turban do not hide the little wooden comb in their hair (many turban wearing men don’t either). Many Sikh physicians with uncut hair don’t wear the steel bracelet all the time because it is not sanitary. Do you see where I’m getting at here? Not every Sikh with uncut hair abides by all 5 Ks. I can see how it is easier to keep your hair than carry a sword, but at the end of the day, how you look DOES NOT DETERMINE YOUR FAITH- or your dedication towards your religion either (This is in fact a teaching from Guru Nanak Dev Ji himself), because religion is not a physical tangible thing, it’s a theory that lives in your mind not on your body. I cut my hair because it’s hard to maintain, I wasn’t blessed with silky beautiful hair, and I live in a world and am in a profession where my appearance matters. I know that being Sikh is not at all about what’s on the outside, but what’s on the inside. (And having more time not doing my hair, gives me more time to serve the community- a Sikh core value) I do wear a karra, which for me is the most practical way in today’s society to still wear the uniform of a Sikh, kind of like how a Christian may wear a Cross around their neck, but if I see a Sikh not wearing one, the thought that they aren’t a Sikh has never crossed my mind. Uncut hair to me is now synonymous to a ritual that is blinding our religion from it’s core values (hmm remind you of something?).
Each Religion, along with Sikhism, have rules along side their beliefs. These rules are there for the beneficence of the followers. For example, something many people don’t know due to the punjabi stereotype, Sikhs are also supposed to refrain from alcohol and meat, why? Because of health reasons, it’s not good for your body. Which makes this rule understandable, but if someone does consume either or both, that still doesn’t mean they don’t embody the values of Sikhism. And nothing enrages me more than when I hear a turban wearing uncle I saw hitting up the bar at a wedding the past weekend, tell me at the Gurudawara I’m not Sikh because of my hair, and his obviously hung over son is. Like really, you can break a rule but I can’t? To put it in a little perspective for other religions- being told your cut hair makes you not a Sikh is like telling a Muslim girl she’s not Muslim because she doesn’t wear a hijab, or a Christian isn’t Christian because they don’t go to church every Sunday. We have other rules that are kind of like rituals as well, but are meant to show respect which is completely understandable- for example in the Sikh prayer hall you must cover your head, and your back should never face the front of the hall where the Guru Granth Sahib is. But even these well accepted rules have been taken way out of context and is part of the reason, in my opinion, Sikhism is falling apart in our society today.
Now that I’ve covered my beef with the hair situation, let’s move on to why the youth is walking away. I’ll start with the story that made me finally write this post- a few weeks ago my uncle passed away, and our family arranged a funeral and prayer processional in a matter of days. It’s customary in pretty much all cultures and religions to keep a picture of the deceased at the front of the ceremonies so you can remember them. My uncle cut his hair, and the picture his children chose to remember him with obviously did not have him wearing a turban. When they showed up to place the picture in the Gurudawara on day one of a three day prayer ceremony (Akhand Path) they were turned away because the PICTURE did not have their father’s head covered, and they had a problem all of the sudden with putting the picture in the front of the room because technically his back would be to Guru Granth Sahib- like come on its a picture for crying out loud! And it’s to honor someone who passed away, why are we getting into the nitty gritty of the rituals and being blinded from how our religion honors those who have left us? After a little bit of arguing our family was allowed to place a picture we found with him wearing a turban at the front of the prayer hall. Please tell me at this point you all are catching my drift and can see how ridiculous that was, and many other actions that elders in our community have taken that are not at all what Sikhism truly represents. Sikhism’s CORE VALUES are- be a good person, be hard working, share your wealth with your community, everyone is equal, be an honest and respectful person, avoid ego, avoid greed, avoid lust and anger, and bring peace- “Kirat Karni, Naam Japo, and Wand Kay Shako.” One of my favorite stories in Sikhism is where a Guru was asked to lunch by a poor man and a rich man – the poor man made it with his own hands and the rich man was greedy, and exploited labor to serve the Guru lunch. When the Guru squeezed the poor man’s roti (bread) milk came out, and when he squeezed the rich man’s roti blood came out. Moral of the story- be an honest and good person. It’s truly a very simple religion. We are supposed to be known as the most inviting religion, where we don’t force you to convert but we welcome you into our home to share our wisdom, in hopes you will share yours. In fact the Golden temple has four doors to enter, because Guru Arjun was aware that the other religions of the world use a specific direction for the layout of their houses of worship, so he had a door placed so that anyone could enter the Temple from the direction his religion dictated. Yet- recently some Sikh council in the UK decided that Sikhs can no longer marry non- Sikhs in a Gurudawara. Once again rituals blinding the religion itself. And this is why we are walking away. I’m still a Sikh, and I love my religion, but I only go to the Gurudawara every once in awhile to listen to Kirtan and meditate to clear my mind so I can get back to studying. I don’t listen to what the elders have to say anymore, because I feel like they are destroying the beautiful religion Sikhism is (and the politics at some of these Gurudawaras are almost as ridiculous as the GOP debates this year). Sikhs are the first to call out other religions for being too radical, but they forget to see what they are doing to their own faith.
Aamir Khan created an entire movie, PK, on how rituals are destroying and blinding religions. A movie everyone in this world should watch.
Guru Nanak Dev Ji created an entire religion, because he felt rituals were destroying and blinding other faiths. It’s sad to see that his followers are undoing all of his hard work. In a time where Sikh hate crimes are at a high, we should be progressing and informing others about the beauty of our religion, not regressing and losing followers.
That was my rant- now you’re probably asking, cool Jyoti, what’re going to do about it? Well I’m going to share this in hopes this makes some people realize what’s going on or realize they aren’t the only one with this thought. And then I’m going to keep Sikhism alive with my own kids- the right way. I don’t know if I will marry another Sikh, but I do know I’ll teach my kids to be a good person like Sikhism embodies, because faith isn’t just something you pray towards, its how you act on a day to day basis.
Let the hater’s hate on this, Chak De Phattey!
-J
Chak De Phattey! 